Friday, February 25, 2005

The One

Is it possible to know if someone is “THE ONE?” Is there a feeling different from the flutteries sometimes mistaken for LOVE? How is it that there have been successful marriages based on nothing more than one guy had a goat and a son, and one guy had a cow and a daughter, and they made a deal? How long do you “have” to know someone, how much time do you “have” to spend together? The worst thing about LOVE is that you can LOVE the wrong person: I mean, the wrong person for you. I think you can LOVE anyone, but you also have to LIKE and RESPECT the person you marry. You can even be happily married without LOVE. LOVE can make you see things in people that are not really there, or are only there in miniscule amounts. You see what you want to see, I guess. There is also the fear of over-thinking things. What if these great qualities really are there, but you are so afraid that you are wrong, that you only think that you imagine them?

You can say, “Well, you just KNOW,” but that is stupid. I mean, 50% of the people in the country have KNOWN that someone was “THE ONE” and got divorced later. And that is not even counting the people who thought someone was the one and realized the mistake before it was too late. That happens all the time. So you can’t “just KNOW.”

You can pray about it, but you still have to be really careful, because just like you can see good or bad qualities that may or may not exist in someone, its really easy to THINK you heard the voice of the Almighty. Sometimes we see what we want to see, hear what we want to her.

I think the real answer might be to KNOW yourself so well, and to be so committed to the goals that God has given you, that you can somewhat impassively consider whether or not something falls in line with that. I mean, if a guy with a goat and a girl with a cow can make it, surely there is a way to make a relationship work, even if someone isn’t “THE ONE.” And you know what else? I don’t think “THE ONE” even exists, just that some people are easier to love than others. That’s all.

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