Wednesday, April 07, 2004


Sometimes you have to wonder if the Fates and Fortune have it in for you. There you are, the perfect example of Murphy's Law when suddenly THEY decide its time to turn your life into a Martini (shaken, not stirred) Graceless, lonely, nothing but a pretty good family and a keen mind to speak of and THEY decide to throw you for a loop. I mean, whats with that? Sometimes you have to stop and wonder how you got so lucky. Sometimes the pain of loving hurts so much, but the void it would leave if it left is a far more terrible picture. Sometimes its hard to imagine that anyone could care as much as you do, and sometimes you are afraid that you care too much. Sometimes its crazy to think that everybody was wrong. You know, everybody. Everybody said you would never deserve this. Everybody said no one could ever love you. Everybody thought you would always be alone, and everybody knew that was exactly as it should be. And then, its like God becomes a cosmic Emeril, shouts "BAM" and suddenly there is this new spice that you never ever thought should be mixed with you, and the genius of it is this... In any world but Emeril's, it wouldn't! And everything comes together and you wonder how you ever lived without that spice in your life. Now you are afraid of using it too much, or making that spice hate you. You wonder what would happen if the spice notices that there are a lot better herbs out there... but that's going a bit far. So there is God mixing it up with the Fates and Fortune, and you know He has a plan for the whole crazy mess, but from down here it just looks like a crazy mess. And where does that leave you? A party up in heaven, but they left the best angel right there with you... and you think, "Hey, isn't that where he should be?" And you hang on tight, because this is one martini that never wants to see life the same way again!

And what is this randomness, you ask? This is what happens when you get really really bored, sitting somewhere you can't leave and listening to someone boring talk. The worst thing is that I can't remember where I was...

Be good, watch T.V.

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